Amelia Nicol
Instinct & Imagination

above picture from the Library of Congress online catalog.
Disarray, the delinquency of daylight or the bending forms of natural saturation in sightliness, the certitude of angling that could account for any amount of interest or investment, the decisions that are already made, this thoughtlessness, contingent on some form of inspiration or impressions and expressions: the tether or the root, the same origins of anything easily enough understood or misconstrued. The will of the observer in the decision making process of the belonging in mental and imaginary event. The distances beyond any and the differences in the significance of any particular symbol or role, dividends of sufficiency or conveyances of inadequacy, the impertinence of uncanny minuteness and the dodging of portrait immanence. These snakes in my hair, staring at these mirrors, pausing and catch framing these fragments of decisions or possibilities in language, catching out statuesque grandeur or still life assumptions of anything. Distant figures of thought, these immediacies of expression and the simultaneity of the frequencies of imagination and common cultural norms. So much common structure to reaction and action, that does not necessitate the use of the idea in function. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, not necessarily any function (indeterminable data: not. for. use). Disproportionate improbabilities of conditioning and the referent tasks of memory or what’s really attached to environment, these attitudes or assumptions of over arching metaphor, the distal invocations of wanted distance or the distances imagined for the source-less electric and imaginal space. These weightless improbabilities of change and chance, the volatile nature of indeterminable data, the space beyond spaciousness and the will of mindfulness in excitability or attention: blood brain barriers and the salt water brine of shores within mind, these romantic beaches to tell of other dimensions, hinting at that which is forever beyond us, this want to course through or portion sense around these ideas, this horrible chewing noise compared with the silence of meditative conditions. The vanity in describing that which is beyond description, silence clarity and stillness, these fearless curiosities that cannot be settled or the need for ontological peace when there is no peace. The connectivity of ideas and the non-congruence of asymmetrical figures of concentration or the wanted need for separations from reality. The ambiguity of validity and the concentration of focal devoid patterning in continuer or the parable and paradigm, (paradox) beyond the ease of shallow similarity. That which connects my inner gnosis to outer knowledge, instinct and imagination, why should I be able to imagine what could be coming up behind me in the woods? The catecholamines necessary to react have already caused one by the time I have imagined exactly what it could be. How many times a bear in the woods was really a house cat. Physiological response caused by imagination and imaginal space created by physiological response. Definitive reality and the perspective sense of conditioning and attention, repetitions of formulaic investments in language and the ritual and routine of breaking apart newness. Cation, a stop region at the end of an RNA strand, non-sense regions that metachromatic granules pick up after, the immediacy of chaos in thought and the ways in which organization of cognitive information takes place: the place values of probable or possible chance or happenstance in ambiguity and the oblivion of obviousness. An idea, sends random, chaotic splatter patterns of possibilities and organizes itself eventually to the common structures and knowledge already present. (Data as nutrients) Gradient potentials in action and the affordance structures of the cognitive economy of rapid solution. Wait, this random junk so easily discarded, the leftover parts that meant a wholeness no one ever needed to pay any attention to, pause and silence, the need for slowness and patience in decision making process and critical thinking. First thoughts bested by the need for analyzing, unafraid of uncertainty, wandering lost and hopeful, these findings of abstract and conceptual want to study and analyze, taken for some form of separation or experimentation: accidental declarations of probability and the abstracted sense of conceptuality.
somewhere in my mind
a blank stare
cautionary wonderment
conditions these risk assessments
decisions already confounded and made
impossible all over again.